Ramblings on What We Share: Restoring the Fallen

It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that even pagans do not tolerate: A man is sleeping with his father’s wife. And you are proud! Shouldn’t you rather have gone into mourning and have put out of your fellowship the man who has been doing this? For my part, even though I am not physically present, I am with you in spirit. As one who is present with you in this way, I have already passed judgment in the name of our Lord Jesus on the one who has been doing this. So when you are assembled and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved on the day of the Lord. I Corinthians 5:1-5

When a Christian falls into destructive sin patterns, it is an emotionally charged situation for both the one who falls and for the ones trying to restore their brother or sister.

For those of us who fall, we experience a confusing mix of emotions from guilt to doubt and from anger to sadness. Being exhorted about sin in your life can be a scary thing. Your reputation is likely ruined. Your friends and family may desert you. You may even lose your church home. You find yourself in a mud pit fighting to keep your head from going under.

For those of us who love someone who has fallen, the path is by no means easier. A profound grief pervades our spirit. We fear the fallen one may not repent and be lost forever. We find it hard to know what to say – wanting to love the sinner, but not sure how to do that without condoning the sin. Even if the lost one is restored, sometimes our relationship with them is forever tainted with the bittersweet memories of the difficult journey of restoration.

Brothers and Sisters, as someone who has been on both sides of the fence, let me beseech you to be kind. You do not need to agree with each other to be kind. You do not need to condone sin to be kind. Kindness warms the heart. It makes the fallen one feel loved and wanted. It eases the grief, the pain and the anger. It sows seeds of light at the end of the tunnel.